My Favorite Boy

My baby brother has an orthodontist appointment this afternoon...I don't know why, but for some reason his getting braces has solidified in my mind that he's not really a baby anymore. This morning he and I sat on the porch and just...talked. And it was weird because I realized that he's not some kid I can boss around anymore...

It seems like just yesterday little seven year old me was mothering my new best friend...



Wasn't he adorable?!? Also I'd like to add
that that is my bike he is riding and those
are my baby converse that he is wearing.

And watching him pretend to be a squirrel...I hope he never sees this because he'll die of embarrassment, but for years he talked about being related to squirrels. I don't really know why.

I feel like I'm allowed to post this super embarrassing picture of
him because it is also a super embarrassing picture of me...but
anyways, there he is, front and center, doing his squirrel pose!
Although I think he might actually be doing a groundhog imperson-
ation in this picture...it's exactly like his squirrel one though!

He's also always had a thing for explosives...one time my parents caught him trying to puncture a can of spray on sunscreen because he wanted to know what the explosion would be like.



This is him and one of our cousins running away
from something they had just set on fire...

I'd post a new picture of him, but I can't find one and I'm too sad to try to get him to let me take one. Also I don't want him to know I posted about him because he'll kick my butt. And he's the same size as me now, so he actually can.

Stuff I Love Right Now

1. My Pandora radio station that's based on Blondie's song "Call Me"

2. Sweet Tea

3. Walks with my dog

4. The Book of Common Prayer (a friend gave me a really pretty copy before I left school and I'm kind of in love with it)

5. This Song

6. This Song

7. The book about faeries that my mumzy got for me. It has really pretty pictures.

8. Leg Warmers. I'm bringing leg warmers back. Not right now though. In the fall. And I can't wait!


9. Chocolate Chip Cookies

10. The movie "We Bought a Zoo" (I love the lion!)

Conviction In the School Newspaper

About a week ago a guy from my school wrote an article about how he feels about the music department at our school. He called out the students and the staff for making fun of people, gossiping, and spreading malicious rumors. I, of course, had been in my own little world this whole time so I missed out on the ensuing battle of anger and retaliation. So when a friend told me about the article today, the Nosy Nelly that lives inside of me couldn't help herself from going on a quest to find a copy of the school newspaper.

Two buildings later...voila!

So I sat down to take in the juicy details because let's be brutally honest here...I worked in that building for a semester...so...it might have felt a teensy bit nice to hear them being called out.

But as I read I didn't feel the satisfaction I thought I would find there. I found...conviction.

For every hurtful thing that's ever been said to or about me I have probably said at least three. I mean, I'm really good at never saying anything mean to someone's face. I'm even better at saying atrocious things behind peoples' backs though.

And as I read that article I realized that it doesn't start with the music department changing it's ways. It doesn't start with the people around me becoming model citizens about whom I never have anything negative to say. It starts with me, because at the end of the day I am literally the only person I can control. The funny thing about words is that when you're around someone who only uses kind ones it's harder to use mean ones.

Little Man Syndrome

Sometimes I'll be eavesdropping on peoples' private conversations and person A will make a statement that person B doesn't agree with, and if said statement has any sort of religious methodology then person B will say something along the lines of, "I'm surprised GOD isn't striking you with lightning right now!"

Of course, that statement is usually just a joke. It's a funny way of telling someone you think he or she is doctrinally out of line. But the other day I was talking about those kind of statements with a friend and we both came to the conclusion that the general consensus of Christians must be that GOD has "little man syndrome."

So of course I decided to do a little research into the Napoleon Complex...using my favorite trusty resource, Wikipedia!

And you know what, they had something interesting to say: "The term is used generally to describe people who are driven by a perceived handicap to overcompensate in other aspects of their lives...The conventional wisdom is that Napoleon compensated for his lack of height by seeking power, war and conquest."

I see this a lot. I think a lot of the times Christians tread carefully around GOD because we think that He needs us. We've somehow come to the conclusion that we have to be careful about offending GOD or somehow hurting His ego. We can't point out the things about Him that are confusing or illogical because secretly we view those as being (Dare I say it?) handicaps.

Now then, I'm not saying that it's okay to just go around saying things that one knows are deliberately untrue about GOD or that we ought to treat GOD flippantly. It's wrong to push GOD's buttons. And it's something I never care to do.

However. I am proposing that maybe, just maybe GOD can handle our confusion about Him. In fact, I would go so far as to say that even when we make crazy accusations at Him when we're upset, He doesn't get angry. I bet He even kind of understands. He gets that we're human and that a lot of the time the stuff He does doesn't really make sense to us. In fact, it's far less limiting to GOD for us to recognize that GOD can handle our "doctrinally out of line" statements.

GOD isn't some egomaniac on a power-trip. I think that's plainly demonstrated by His willingness to let us choose whether or not we want to obey Him, trust Him, or even just plain believe in Him. GOD strongly desires those things from us, but if we don't give them to Him, He'll still go on being GOD. He's not some little man suffering from insecurity who needs followers and countries and kingdoms and power to feel like He really is GOD. He wants and deserves those things. But He does not need them, nor is He defined by them.

Puppies and Profanity

So this clip has a lot of bad language. You've been warned.

Bridesmaids...oh Bridesmaids. One of the most inappropriate movies I have ever seen...and yet at the same time, it's one of the most real movies I've ever seen. Granted, I usually can't manage to stay awake during movies.

I see glimpses of myself in the main character of this movie. In fact, I think almost every female who has actually sat down and watched this movie finds a little piece of herself in Annie. Whether it's in her failed dreams, broken relationships, or the plain and simple fact that she can't manage to get her tail lights fixed. 

For me, it's Annie's tendency to lie on the couch and cry about life. Every time I watch that movie I find myself fixated on this scene. Confession: I'm a moper. I have dedicated a large amount of my life toward throwing myself pity parties on the couch. I don't really know why other than it fills me with an artificial sense of satisfaction.

But every time I watch this movie I realize that I don't want to be an Annie. I want to be a Megan. I mean, I don't want to go around tackling and biting people all while screaming profanities at them...but I do want her attitude. Later on in the scene Megan talks about how when she got made fun of in high school she chose to be happy with who she was rather than going home crying to mommy. She chose to work hard to achieve what she wanted, and rather than moping on the couch when she failed, she picked herself up and started over.

And heck, Megan ended up with nine puppies. So I think she's sitting pretty.

#that moment when you realize you're a hipster

So guys...I think I might be a hipster. But only in the most minimalistic sense of the word! But the other day a friend pointed out that I have hipster-ish qualities so now I've been obsessively thinking about it and trying to decide if I really am one or not. So I made two lists. One has the reasons for why I might be a hipster and the other is reasons why I definitely am not one.

(Reasons I Might Be a Hipster)

1. I have said the words, "I am not a hipster." on numerous occasions. Classic hipster move.

2. I wore this sweater with shorts earlier this week. It wasn't cold. I just wanted to wear the sweater.

3. One of my favorite phrases: "That's ironic."

4. These are the books that I read for fun. I feel like the fact that I have read Atlas Shrugged twice permanently places me in the hipster category...

5. I have a blog. And I regularly post on it. (Obviously)

6. I write poetry when I'm bored in class.

7. I watch a lot of documentaries.

8. I'm really good at being pretentious and pretending like I know what I'm talking about when secretly I have no clue what the heck is going on.

9. Sometimes I try to play the guitar.

(Reasons Why I Am NOT a Hipster)

1. I don't frequent snotty coffee houses...instead I just brew it myself. Or go to Starbucks. A hipster would never set foot in Starbucks, right?

2. One of my minors is in Criminal Justice. That's super un-hipsterish, right? I mean, what kind of hipster has time to think about laws?  

3. There are no indie/alternative films in my movie collection. Just don't look at my iTunes account...

4. I don't carry a messenger bag.

5. I don't wear hipster-looking glasses. I wear librarian-looking glasses.  Although the bangs might make this a moot point. Granted, I grew out my bangs so...

6. I don't own a pair of Toms.

7.  When I'm upset I dance around and sing to Britney Spears and N'Sync music.

8. I don't own a bike.

9. I...don't have a lumberjack-like beard?

So I guess it's a toss-up...