A Description of the Perfect Man

1. He not only anticipates my quirks and strange habits, he also happens to think they’re adorable and hilarious.

2. He takes me out for good food.

3. He buys me legal pads. I love legal pads. I won’t leave home without one.

4. He listens to me complain and he takes my side while also tactfully pointing out the flaws in my logic. This is a rare talent.

5. He always brings me a crème soda in a glass bottle.

6. When he sees classical or eighties music in thrift stores, he buys it for me.

7. He is one of the safest people I know. He is always checking the perimeter for danger. He doesn’t jaywalk. He drives five miles under the speed limit. Ten if he’s telling a story.

8. He killed a bear with a knife. Even though I had nothing to do with this I definitely brag about it regularly.

9. He’s one of the few people I can sit in silence with and have it not be awkward. I think this is pretty cool.