I have trouble accepting forgiveness. I like to work things out on my own. I like pretend that I can work out my salvation without the Holy Spirit. When I fall short, I plummet into a state of guilt that I won’t let myself out of. My life has been a constant cycle of failed attempts at flawlessness. I’ve spent years trying to convince GOD that I’m good enough to deserve Him. And yet, no matter how many lists I make, or how many books about GOD I read, or how hard I try to convince others of my spirituality, or how many Christian t-shirts, c.d.’s and knick-knacks I own, I’ve never been able to do anything more than build up my pride.
Tenth Avenue North’s song, “House of Mirrors” talks about how we get so caught up in focusing on our flaws that we forget that we’ve already been set free. (The whole Tenth Avenue North album “The Light Meets the Dark” is amazing.) In their song, “You are More” they sing, “You are more than the choices that you’ve made. You are more than the sum of your past mistakes. You are more than the problems you create. You’ve been re-made.” It’s so easy to forget that my life is not about atoning for my sins. That’s already been done by Christ on the Cross. Instead, my life is to be about glorifying GOD and sharing how He has provided atonement for my sins.
In The Gift of Forgiveness, Charles Stanley says, “GOD’s forgiveness does not depend on our confession, nor does His fellowship...Our fellowship with GOD is not restored by confession (because it was never broken); rather, our sense of fellowship with GOD is restored. When we sin, we withdraw our fellowship from GOD; He does not withdraw His fellowship from us. Forgiveness is ours as believers. The moment we received Him as Savior, He became our life. But our capacity to enjoy forgiveness-our capacity to enjoy a clean conscience- is based on our willingness to acknowledge and confess that sin”.
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